In the first episode at the family BBQ, everybody had just shown up and were standing around until Cousin Sarah appeared. In today's episode, we join the family BBQ two kegs in and somewhat worse for wear.
You are standing there listening to drunk ass and several of his cohorts griping among themselves that they would have had a better time at the party if Cousin Sarah hadn't shown up. She made them spend time getting the tent set up and laying out the food when all they wanted to do was sit around, drink some beer and listen to Uncle John's war stories.
Their stupidity, jealousy and general ingratitude pisses you off so bad you can't help yourself. You walk up to the loudest mouth in the group, get in his face and say,"Listen up, @#$% face. If Cousin Sarah hadn't shown up with some moose burgers and something to light the fire with, you would have been sitting in the grass fending off ants while you tried to swallow down the crappy raw hamburgers and stale potato chip crumbs Mom and Dad was going to serve.If you are lucky, they put down their wine glasses and half empty beer cans before they slink out the door still muttering about some cousin from the boonies they never heard of coming in and messing up their party.
So, suck it up. Next time you want to have a little more free time to enjoy the party, show up early, bring some food and beer, chip in some money and help get things set up before everybody shows up to eat. Otherwise, shut up and just say, 'thank you', you ungrateful jackasses."
Their party! It's not even their freaking house! It's our house and they were invited guests. But, you know families, there are always one or two who think they are better than the rest and always take for granted that they are somehow the life of the party and its reason for being.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
The Family BBQ Just Went South
at Ace of Spades, by Kat-Mo: